Old Market Pub
The rain was beginning to abate and the swollen rivers recede when YT and his stalwart companion, FLS, decided to return to a new favorite: the
Old Market Pub. They had conducted a handful of scouting missions into the establishment, as it is the closest microbrewery to YT’s domicile. However, the scouting missions were of the abbreviated variety and weren’t a serious investigative foray.
This would be no scouting mission. This sortie would be different. A thorough expedition into the territory of craft brewing.
The first thing a pint-hoister will notice upon entering is that the pub is aptly named. In the building’s former life it was obviously some sort of farmer’s market or old grocery store. Taking a page out of a Discovery-channel program, the interior decorator didn’t change much and actually borrowed many of the old fixtures. The booths and tables are simple varnished light wood. The salt and pepper shakers are Corona bottles with nail-holes in the caps. The original cement floors are still underfoot. The hanging flower pots are converted produce scales. The taps (I counted about two dozen) are mounted on a rough plywood wall. This is a no-frills kinda hangout. And it is quite the hangout. The floor plan is spacious, with lots of little hideouts. Any given night you’ll find a diverse fauna; from Oregon’s native organic Yuppie to college kids studying chemistry. But I’ve spent more than enough time on OMP’s ecosystem.
On to my after-action report.
We ordered a nine-cup sampler, which came shy of their full retinue. To a serious pint-hoister like YT and yourself, this is disappointing. Joining it in the disappointing corner was a laminated sheet of paper under the glasses naming the samples and providing descriptions. This sheet I promptly ignored.
Multnomah Village Golden is light and mild. In the grand tradition of filtered wheat beer, that’s about all it is. Oh, and the lack of even the slightest bitters leaves the mouth feeling sticky.
Great White Wheat I do not recommend ordering after a few jars. If you must order, point at the menu. Pointing will work better than trying to enunciate all those mushy sounds with a numb tongue. So bland I could taste the dish detergent in the glass more than the beer. The carbonation was week, leaving the beer flat and there was a slight buttery flavor at the back of the tongue. FLS, aka The Great Bearded Wine Dork, described this a diacetyl. As I am just another random beer drinker and don’t know the difference between diacetyl and dehydrogenase, I just nodded and said “tastes like butter.”
Mr. Slates Gravelberry tastes simply of berries and not a whole lot else. Remember those Original New York seltzers from back in the day? This tastes exactly like those. Dry berry all the way with a sweet cloying finish.
British Bombay IPA brings us out of the Woods of Mediocrity. While we aren’t in Tastilicious Grove, we are on our way. The tip of the tongue picks up the hops and then realizes that the hops have been exposed to fire. The roasted—or as I like to call it: burnt—flavor continues through the mouth to the end of the swig. There is a slight papery aftertaste, and a grapefruit citrus lurks behind the roasted hop flavor.
Rat Dog ESB shows how my taste skills lack precise distinction. This beer tastes an awful lot like the IPA. Perhaps in pint form you could make a better differentiation. Excuses aside, this bitter goes further in flavor and leaves the mouth with a lot more grapefruit. It lacked the roasted flavor. Good clean bitter fun.
Hop Out is the third beer featuring hops. It’s darker than the other of a feather and has more straight bitter flavor. I didn’t taste much citrus or grapefruit that makes the IPAs and ESBs so interesting and refreshing. I might have tasted a hint of berry, but then again my taste buds might have found some left-over Gravelberry and were having themselves a little party. Sneaky little buds.
Mr. Toads Wild Red is a rich red ale and as far as I can tell has little or nothing to do with Disneyland. It starts with a roasted malt flavor and ends on a slightly hoppy note, cutting the sticky aftertaste. The experience is rich and balanced and would make a good winter quaff.
Pacific Porter steps away from the porters I’ve come to consider traditional and yet doesn’t step too far out-of-bounds. The mouth is surprised to find a burnt-oak flavor reminiscent of scotch whiskey. The beer finishes in the cloying malty way porter usually ends. While my adage, “just because it’s different, doesn’t mean its better,” still proves true here, this beer is different and still tasty.
Red Deluder is the seasonal beer included in the sampler. The waiter hollered the name and I couldn’t quite make it out. There is a slight possibility that it is actually called Red Deluser or Red Deluger, but since those don’t make much sense, I think the name is moderately accurate. Because it’s a seasonal beer, and the season I’m tasting in is the winter, I expected a winter-style beer. The beer’s dark color enhanced this expectation. This beer landed us right back into the Woods of Mediocrity. More accurately: mediocrity with a slight hint of onions. I don’t know what they were trying to do with this beer, but I definitely didn’t get it.
These are some of the beers that didn’t come with the sampler:
Hot Tamale is the most accurately titled beer name I’ve come across. After tasting it, and after tasting something else for a while, and after wiping tears off my cheeks, I realized the yeast must have been eating pepper oil. Which means they are strong little matador yeasts imported from South America who shout “Olé” in the face of danger. My tongue is not this type of swashbuckling Latino superhero and thus promptly ran away. While I do not recommend it (for legal reasons), this is the beverage you throw in the face of someone you truly hate and want to hospitalize.
Pinochle Pale Ale is really the jewel in OMP’s crown and finally transports us to the refreshing shade of Tastilicious Grove. Besides the cool name that just asks to be verbalized, especially after a few jars, it has all the elements that make beer the drinkable beverage that it is. Its citrus hopiness is balanced and it finishes crisp, leaving the mouth wanting more.
This pub is a great watering hole. Lots of draft micros. Lots of space. If you can’t find a proprietary brew you like, there’s probably a guest spigot that tickles your particular fancy. In fact, the hardest thing about this pub will be picking one beer out of the few dozen they have available. They don’t have a website that I know of, bit they are located at 6959 S.W. Multnomah in Portland and can be reached at (503) 244-0450.
Keep your palette clean and your hoisting arm strong,
-YT
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